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    Entries in elections (22)

    Thursday
    Nov102016

    The 2016 Jaunty Election Guide: 50% Turnout Edition

    Friends,

    The election results are in and with only 50% turnout in one of the most acrimonious, contemptible races in the modern era, this country has elected a fascist as the next Commander-In-Chief. Congratulations!

    To everyone who voted for Tangerine Mussolini, please take a moment to explain to all of the black, hispanic, Jewish, Muslim, and female people in your life why you don't care about them. While you're at it, I'm interested to hear why you apparently value party over country, bonkers ideology over security, and choosing a carnival barker to represent the United States to the world. Also, considering that the dead-eyed granny-starving Speaker of the House is champing at the bit to dismantle Social Security, please explain to the elderly people why you don't care about them either.

    Shameless.

    Tuesday
    Nov082016

    The 2016 Jaunty Election Guide: Something Easy

    A lovely centered picture encouraging you to vote

     

    Friends,

    I have to admit that this election has left me cold and exhausted. I certainly haven't been as interested in discussing the merits of banning plastic bags, which I support, against grabbing bag fees and reallocating them towards something else, which is a trick by the plastics industry. We get the chance to end the death penalty in the state during this election and that should have been a big topic for debate, but it wasn't.

    What we got instead was so many candidates for President of the United States that the selection process resembled little more than news anchors swatting at a hornets' next with a stick that was far too short. Thanks to the insatiable teevee ratings machine, a bloviating yam was given too much free airtime to make outrageous, and to my sensitive ears unamerican, statements about minorities and majorities. Once they had the statements recorded, they could play them over and over, asking pundits what they thought about them. "Outragous or TOO outrageous? We'll ask our panel after this commercial break..."

    While this was happening, people who would normally be considered apologists for any other candidiate in any other election cycle instead went on camera and denied that their favorite tangerine-tinted bota bag ever said anything offensive. Or even said that thing that was on full display on the video running beside them. I believe that this distaste for the facts is unprecedented in Republican politics, and that's really saying something considering their recent history in the Congress.

    What alarms me about this election is that there are so many disqualifying aspects to the GOP's Orange Julius Caesar that it's hard to know where to start: Financial ties to Russia? He hasn't released his taxes? In hock up to his eyeballs? Bragging about sexual assault? Misuse of a personal charity? Calling for the trial, jailing or assasination of his political opponent?

    That's not the alarming part. We know he's a terrible human being. What's alarming is that there are too many people in this country who think all of that is okay. Okay in their president.

    It's not okay. It never was. You can help save the United States and the rest of the free world by voting for a competent candidate who won't throw a temper tantrum and blow us all up. You can vote for a woman who has the skills to apply reason to a problem, not just a tweet storm. You can vote for someone with a lifetime of public service who has faced scrutiny and survived instead of a man who lashes out when people make fun of his tiny hands.

    You have one job America.

    Wednesday
    Jul272011

    Blink.

    I can't bear to look.
    Friends,

    Congress has decided to play a game of chicken with the finances of the United States. A game of high-speed mumbley peg with the nation's digits under their rusty jack knife. What's worse, (a worse thing, or are you extending the metaphor? -ed) is that the country's economy hasn't recovered enough to afford even a tetanus shot against the missteps of these ham-fisted apes. Before you get all fiscal on me, I'm not cutting the prevaricator in chief any slack on this either. He had the opportunity at the beginning of the year to ask for a clean debt increase bill and missed his chance. Now it's the '72 Munich Olympics in the capitol with our finances held at gunpoint, all due to some red meat types latching on to the idea that a debt limit increase is for future spending and not to pay for stuff we already bought.

    The Treasury Department has set a deadline for next Monday when we'll run out of money to write checks for government things, like checks for pensioners and tranquilizers to keep the space monsters we've locked up from eating us. We're in a pickle, folks.

    What will happen? Will the legislative and executive branches cut a last-minute deal? Will the president, in lieu of a deal, exert his executive privilege to extend the debt ceiling on his own? Will the "full faith and credit of the United States" be as suspect as a clean lab result from a professional bicycle racer? The answer to these questions, and whether we're all doomed, will be answered next Monday.

    In the meanwhile, fill up your gas tanks. Just saying.

    - bob
    Tuesday
    Jun082010

    A Jaunty Little Election Guide**

     

    Friends,

    It's the most wonderful time of the year again. The flowers are blooming, the birds are singing their sweet song, and candidates will finally end their ad buys. Yes, it's California Statewide Direct Primary Election Day! As a service to you, the voter who hasn't voted yet, I offer analysis of the propositions from The Best Political Team on this Blog™. Like to hear it? Well here it goes...

    • Prop 13 - Limits on Property Tax Assessment. Siesmic Retrofitting of Existing Buildings: First off, no, this isn't that Prop 13. This one fixes a loophole in the tax code that currently allows property value reassessment if you do something crazy like enhance the structure of your building so it doesn't fall down in an earthquake. My question is, which tax assessors were doing this in the first place? (see: tar, feathers) We're suggesting you vote for this.
    • Prop 14 - Increases Right to Participate In Primary Elections: In what seems like a good idea on first blush, Proposition 14 was essentially a sop to Abel Maldonado to secure his vote on last year's budget. The legislature really don't like it because they claim it diminishes the role of traditional party structures in the state. I'm not sure that's not an idea worth pursuing, but I'm also not sure that the legislature hasn't poisoned this thing before placing it on the ballot. Arnold is for it, all of the parties are against it. We're guardedly suggesting a vote in favor.
    • Prop 15 - California Fair Elections Act: If you were looking for a reason to throw out the initiative process, this proposition might be a leading exhibit in your case. It's narrowly focused on a problem nobody knew we had, it's artfully worded to draw a yes vote even though that might not be a good idea, and it plays on anti-politician sentiment. If nothing else, we think it's too cynical to be worthy of your consideration.
    • Prop 16 - Imposes New Two-thirds Voter Approval Requirement for Local Public Electricity Providers: This is also known as the Pacific Gas & Electric Self-Preservation Act. PG&E is interested in making it harder for municipalities to start their own public electric companies and who can blame them? Well, everybody. Their ads for this make happy noises about consumer choice and reigning in government spending. What we all know is that two-thirds approval is an awfully high bar to set. They want this too badly, outspending the opposition by over 400-to-1. Because of the insidiousness of their motives, and that this is going to amend the California Constitution, we're strongly urging a no vote.
    • Prop 17 - Allows Auto Insurance Companies to Base Their Prices in Part On a Driver's History of Insurance Coverage: Mercury Insurance would like for you to overturn existing law so that they can charge higher rates to first-time policy holders or those with lapsed coverage. Pretty neat, huh? We don't think so either.

    Well, that's it for the guide. We'd like for you to go out and vote today. I mean, how can you pass on sticking one of these jokers with the worst job in the country:

     

    Accepted Prop. 34 Spending Limits Candidate Name Party
    * Richard William Aguirre Democratic
      S. Deacon Alexander Green
    * Stewart A. Alexander Peace & Freedom
    * Carlos Alvarez Peace & Freedom
      Mohammad Arif Peace & Freedom
      Edmund G. "Jerry" Brown Democratic
    * Bill Chambers Republican
    * Lowell Darling Democratic
    * Vibert Greene Democratic
    * Douglas R. Hughes Republican
    * Ken J. Miller Republican
    * Lawrence "Larry" Naritelli Republican
    * Robert C. Newman II Republican
    * Chelene Nightingale American Independent
    * Dale F. Ogden Libertarian
    * Charles "Chuck" Pineda, Jr. Democratic
      Steve Poizner Republican
    * Markham Robinson American Independent
      Peter Schurman Democratic
    * Joe Symmon Democratic
      David Tully-Smith Republican
    * Laura Wells Green
      Meg Whitman Republican

     

    Your pal,

    - bob

    ** WEDNESDAY MORNING UPDATE: It looks like we're batting 1.000 this cycle with all of the propositions we supported going on to victory and those we didn't, going down to defeat. Thanks for doing exactly what we called for, California! Now, about that million dollar check you were going to send our way...

    *** WEDNESDAY MORNING UPDATE II: According to the Secretary of State, only 16.5% of registered voters in Riverside County made the effort yesterday. To say that's a pathetic turnout is a little like saying BP's oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico is an "oopsie," or that King Kong was a monkey who was irritated by aircraft. Dear 83.5% of Riverside County voters who opted out yesterday, you stink.

    Tuesday
    Apr132010

    Happy Special Election Day!

    Friends,

    Today is a special election here in California State Senate District 37 where we select who will replace John Benoit, who replaced the late Roy Wilson on the Riverside County Board of Supervisors (ahem, no term limits). On the ballot are a couple guys who are trying to out-conservative each other, a third party nut, and some cats who seem to be representing labor.

    My recommendation is pretty simple. No matter who you pick to replace Benoit, please go and vote. This is particularly true if you happen to live in my tiny (<i>and idyllic? - ed</i>) alpine village. As was reported in our paper of record last week, we may not donate much money to campaigns, but if candidates study voting patterns they see that we turn out in higher percentages than the lowlanders. This forces the serious ones to actually stop by and talk to my neighbors during elections.

    Who knew that you could gain the attention of elected officials merely by voting?

    Will wonders never cease?

     

    - bob

    Wednesday
    Aug262009

    Happy 19th Amendment Certification Day!

    Women compounding chemists are pretty upset too, you know.
    Friends,

    On this date 89 years ago, Secretary of State Bainbridge Colby (of the St. Louis Colbys, btw) certified the 19th Amendment to the United States Constitution. Thus, women across the country were guaranteed their right to vote.

    Considering that women outnumber men in the country, this momentous occasion has led to the election of many female presidents including our 57th president, Miley Cyrus.

    Congratulations, women!

    - bob

    Tuesday
    May192009

    Jaunty Election Central - Your Vote Can Save The Republic!

    Look out! It's an unrestrained bear!Friends,

    Today we hold a special election in this great state of California which asks voters to bless legislative theft from different programs and constituencies to cover for their inaction. A simple thing, really. We labor under the highest tax burden in the country, but the assembly has raised those rates and would like our vote to keep them longer. The Lottery has some cash that they'd like to use to fill the budget gap. Maybe little children and the mentally infirm won't notice if their pockets are picked as well. Sounds great! Where's my polling place!

    Polls show all of the budget related measures slated for crushing defeat. The nice thing about crushing is that it's so much more satisfying when it's louder, so go out and vote.

    Your pal,

    - bob

    P.S. Yes, I know the budget deficit is slated to top $21 billion if the measures don't pass. I also know that there are going to be painful cuts either way, except that the defeat of these measures amounts to a public outrage chaser.

    Tuesday
    Nov182008

    Jaunty Dumptruck O' News: Birthday Edition

    Friends,

    Before we get started, I'd like to wish a very happy birthday to the senior senator from Alaska, indicted convicted felon Ted "Uncle Ted" Stevens.

    Super happy birthday boy.
    The man who threw his own wife under the bus during his corruption trial is 85 today and a little over a thousand votes behind Anchorage Mayor Mike Begich in a vote count that started two weeks ago (!). Republican senators are trying to decide today whether to expel the most senior member of their party from the chamber. Apparently, (and this is something of a surprise to me) they would rather not hang out with felons. Something about doing bad things for the image of their party...

    Alert: obvious sight gag.
    Frankly, if I were them, I don't know if I'd worry so much.

    - bob

    UPDATE: It's all moot. Uncle Ted seems to have lost his reelection bid. Such a pity, and Happy Birthday!

    UPDATE II: Quote of the day that I'm going to repurpose for this special occasion:

    "They gave me this gold watch, man, but it ain't tickin'."

    Goodbye Uncle Ted. We'll miss you.

    Wednesday
    Nov052008

    Jaunty Election Central - Hangover Edition

    Friends,

    According to the election results from the Secretary of State's office this morning, we Californians are a bunch of irresponsible, reactionary bigots with hearts of gold. Let's take a closer look at the jackassery that took place yesterday. This is with 94.6% of the precincts reporting:

    • Prop 1A - Safe, Reliable High-Speed Passenger Train Bond Act: Remember how we don't have any money and nobody's buying bonds in this economic climate? Remember how this proposition posits that if we sell ten billion dollars in bonds, that will encourage the feds and private companies to give us the rest of the money we'd need to build a new science fiction choo choo train? And how insane is that? This one is winning 52.3% to 47.7% Holy crap. Are you people drunk?
    • Prop 2 - Standards for Confining Farm Animals: Happy cows win 63.3% to 36.7%. Aw, you guys are swell.
    • Prop 3 - Children's Hospital Bond Act: We still have a huge deficit, but what the heck, let's make it more huger! Winning 54.8% to 45.2%
    • Prop 4 - Waiting Period and Parental Notification Before Termination of Minor's Pregnancy The voters think this should lose (I eventually did too), and it is 47.6% to 52.4%
    • Prop 5 - Nonviolent Drug Offenses. Sentencing, Parole and Rehabilitation: Also losing 40.2% to 59.8% It would let "drug dealers back out on the streets" after all. Or something.
    • Prop 6 - Police and Law Enforcement Funding. Criminal Penalties and Laws: This one is also losing big—30.5% to 69.5% I've heard that people just didn't like the budgetary constraints but others didn't like the creation of brand new crimes.
    • Prop 7 - Renewable Energy Generation: This needed to fail and it is failing 35.0% to 65.0%
    • Prop 8 - Eliminates Right of Same-Sex Couples to Marry: Bigots win! 52.1% to 47.9%
    • Prop 9 - Criminal Justice System. Victim's Rights. Parole: Yeah, this one is winning too 53.3% to 46.7% The constitution—it's not just for defining fundamental rights anymore!
    • Prop 10 - Alternative Fuel Vehicles and Renewable Energy Bonds: I guess T. Boone Pickens will have to build his own natural gas stations. This one is failing hard 40.1% to 59.9%
    • Prop 11 - Redistricting: This is barely squeaking by, winning by one percentage point, 50.5% to 49.5% Cross whatever you have that's crossable and hope this passes. It's our ticket to getting rid of the fools in the capitol.
    • Prop 12 - Veterans' Bond Act of 2008: I don't see how you could vote against this, but 36.5% did. Not good enough to beat the 63.5% of voters in favor. This would be an example, I think, of people not reading the sample ballot. I know, horror!

    So thanks for stopping in for our election coverage and thanks for voting, you schizophrenic nutjobs.

    Your pal,

    bob

    Tuesday
    Nov042008

    Jaunty Election Central - So, Who Won?

    Seems like we can all use a little hope...

    Tuesday
    Nov042008

    Jaunty Election Central - McCain's Chances at 7:00 PM

    Um...

    Sure, it can work.
    - bob

    Tuesday
    Nov042008

    Jaunty Election Central - Tension At The Polling Place

    Okay, there wasn't any tension. A couple booths were open so I was able to breeze in and out. It was a lovely Autumn afternoon and everybody seemed to be pretty happy to be there. Even the guys who were denied the vote seemed to be okay with it.

    Idyllwild Town Hall on 4th November, 2008

    "Can I register today to vote?" the lumberjack asked. "You can register now, but you can't vote in this election," the frizzy-haired volunteer chirped. "Maybe next time then..."

    The other guy wasn't on the rolls, but wouldn't take a provisional ballot. Despite that, he went away with a big smile. Maybe it was gas.

    - bob

    Tuesday
    Nov042008

    Jaunty Election Central - A New Day In America

    At least the sun still came up this morning. That's something, isn't it?

    Is that a Miniature Racecar?

    Stormy!
    ...and you were worried.

    - bob

    Tuesday
    Nov042008

    Jaunty Election Central - Extremely Early Results

    Happy Election Day, Patriots,

    We're going to be sporadically covering the election all throughout the day and into the night along with analysis from the Best Political Team On This Blog™. So let's get right to it...

    Dixville Notch, NH: Obama 15, McCain 6

    Wow! Decisive, but what does this mean for the rest of the country? Well, no candidate has won the presidency without receiving votes in Dixville Notch, so it's sort of a bellweather. Thank you.

    Now go vote!

    - bob

    Monday
    Oct272008

    Jaunty Election Guide!

    My Friends (sorry about that...),

    I know everybody worries about what I think when it comes to the vote for California's bazillion ballot propositions. Usually, my rule is simple—no new bond measures and stop amending the Constitution. That stance is overly simplistic, I admit, and this year I've reconsidered my position for a single proposition couple propositions. You'll have to read on to catch the subtle clues...

    • Prop 1A - Safe, Reliable High-Speed Passenger Train Bond Act: This one is first on the list and a dizzying brew of magical thinking combined with not so much. Get this, this measure asks voters to approve $9.95 billion in general obligation bond sales that the state can't afford AND hopes that the feds will pitch in (you may have noticed they don't have any spare cash either) along with private investors (who've slammed their checkbooks shut right about now). It doesn't even require that a train system gets built. We just need to think about it and hire consultants! Whee! I'm sure these cats can spend the cash at way over 220 MPH.
    • Prop 2 - Standards for Confining Farm Animals: Farm animals get to get out of their cubicles, stretch their legs, have a smoke break (I made that last part up). Opponents say that this will force California farmers to pack it in, with the void filled by dangerous salmonella-tainted Mexican eggs! Boo! Look, this thing is gonna cost us money if it passes and I still think it's worth doing. Would you pay extra for California cheese from truly happy California cows? Of course you would. It's happier.
    • Prop 3 - Children's Hospital Bond Act: No more bonds. These guys want $980 million to give to children's hospitals. They haven't spent the money from the last bonds. But hey, it's about the children, right? Right?
    • Prop 4 - Waiting Period and Parental Notification Before Termination of Minor's Pregnancy Wow. You could say that this is about chipping away at privacy rights and you'd be right. You could also say that minors needn't be afforded those rights. Patient's rights versus parent's rights versus danger of retaliation. I still have no idea what to do with this one because I'm wholly unqualified to judge.
    • Prop 5 - Nonviolent Drug Offenses. Sentencing, Parole and Rehabilitation: This saves the state some money by kicking folks out of the penal system early to rehabilitate. We've got a big problem funding the huge prison system in this state, but shouldn't folks convicted of crimes punishable by prison time spend their time in prison? Isn't it supposed to be unpleasant? I'm not sold on this one.
    • Prop 6 - Police and Law Enforcement Funding. Criminal Penalties and Laws: Following on Prop 5, this one seems to be designed to scare everybody and pigeonhole funds for cops while upping penalties for certain crimes while creating new ones. C'mon, guys. Aren't we a little smarter than to fall for this bunk?
    • Prop 7 - Renewable Energy Generation: Requires certain percentages of renewable sources in the electricity mix. The Union of Concerned Scientists isn't feeling the love here for many reasons, but I heard only one statistic that made sense to me—this calls for 20% renewables by 2010. We're at 10% now so it's hard to believe that the 20% target is even attainable. There are noncompliance penalties, but I'm guessing Edison, PG&E or SDG&E aren't going to absorb them, will they?
    • Prop 8 - Eliminates Right of Same-Sex Couples to Marry: Maybe just call it the "I hate the gays" amendment. Hating? Bad. Amending the constitution again? Stupid. Thanks for nothing, dimwit right wing bigots.
    • Prop 9 - Criminal Justice System. Victim's Rights. Parole: Most of this is already covered in those silly laws. Not good enough! Somebody needs to amend the Constitution to drive the point home. How about no?
    • Prop 10 - Alternative Fuel Vehicles and Renewable Energy Bonds: I've heard this called the "T. Boone Pickens Bailout Act" by selling bonds (that we still can't afford) to give folks cash for natural gas cars and research! That's a lot of new cash out of the General Fund, eh?
    • Prop 11 - Redistricting: Opponents of Prop 11 have ads up trying to frighten voters with the idea that this constitutional amendment will establish an independent board to draw legislative districts every decade. That's not a bug, that's a feature! A commissioner is selected based on specific criteria, then by random drawing. Not a legislator drawing his or her own safe district boundaries! Again, a feature. If you vote in favor of one thing, if you hold out hope that the process can potentially ever be fixed, this is the last best hope. I think we should take a chance on it.
    • Prop 12 - Veterans' Bond Act of 2008: This is the only bond measure that actually has the beneficiaries pay for it. And who do we saddle with the bill? Veterans, fer crissakes. We shouldn't have to do anything like that. In my perfect world, veterans get whatever they need on a silver plate. Sadly, this world isn't perfect, but $900 million seems cheap to provide loans for vets to buy homes and farms in the state. Hell, they might even raise herds of happy cows.

    So go vote, won't you? What are you waiting for?

    Your pal,

    bob

    Wednesday
    Oct152008

    Jaunty Dumptruck O' News! - Debate Roundup!

    I feel dirty.

    I'm gonna need a shower after this debate [warning: adobe flash 10 required on terrible myspace-hosted site. - ed Does it use Flash because democracy hates UNIX? at least. mostly the commission on presidential debates hates you—a lot. -ed] just to get the stink off. Post-partisan? Change? Straight talk? Holy crap. We here at the Lodge are flabbergasted...

    Puppies: file photo
    The "health of the mother" is an "extreme abortionist view" held by radicals? Really? The Girly Dog is not impressed...

    Now then, Senator. Let's talk.
    Charter schools are the "greatest civil rights issue..." of the next century? How about this one? Sarah Palin knows a bunch about autism? I'm guessing she knows more than she bargained for about Down Syndrome, so maybe that's true, but I suspect that the senator from Arizona was a touch confused.

    I'll never have that recipe again.
    A touch?

    William Ayers. ACORN. Clean coal. Good lord, shut the hell up. What might you deign to do about the economy, mayhaps?

    - bob

    Thursday
    Mar062008

    Notes Suitable For A Nine-Inch Screen

    Friends,

    Here are a couple things that just made me smile. You'll note that there's nothing here about work. There's a reason for that.

    One Laptop Per Nephew - I was finally able to deliver the tiny laptop to my six-year old nephew's Charge d'Affaires and gave her a little instruction on its operation. No real manual is available and my help was minimal, but the printed Quick Start guide give a nod toward serendipity. She sent this note:

    I just had to write you a quick note about the laptop. So Maxi was eating his breakfast as I jumped into the shower. I could hear him shout, "YES!" I finished up and he yelled to me, "Mama, I got on the internet!"

    He was sitting on the couch with the computer in his lap and sure enough, he was on the net. He was so proud of himself. He said, "Mama, I figured it out before you could." Then he showed me a map of Europe. "Here's Sweden." He went on and on exploring different countries.

    I think in a way it is good that there is no instruction b/c he was really excited to figure it out on his own and then show me how to use it.

    Thanks so much.This is really an amazing present.

    "Here's Sweden." Good gravy, he's already smarter than the rest of us. I always thought that Sweden was a county in Wisconsin.

    The Mighty Road Racing Dakota - I out-drove and out-handled a guy in a late model Porsche Carrera 4 running down the hill this morning. In a crappy (but free) ten year old, four-cylinder mid-size American pickup. I found it a completely bizarre and hilarious development. It's so wrong.

    Primaries - Obama won Texas after all by three delegates? Breaks the narrative of Hillary as comeback kid, doesn't it? Dad's already bored by this thing though. We usually have a long chat about the latest results on the phone, but this week he couldn't care less. And he watches fishing shows—on purpose!

    The Mollusk Channel - The Clam has been doing very well with the weather predictions lately. Everyone else (except for Yahoo!, who we don't track regularly) has been wildly inaccurate. Your winning lottery numbers are forthcoming...

    Your pal,

    - bob

    Tuesday
    Feb192008

    Super Delicious Cheese Tuesday

    Well, well, well...

    What have we here? It seems that Mister Obama has won Wisconsin this evening. Isn't that nice? Does this make Mrs. Clinton yesterday's news? Kaus put up some speculation that there might be a sympathy vote for her in Texas and Ohio now that she appears to be on the ropes. I don't buy it.

    Call me a sexist if you want (and boy, are you itching to do that right now. you know where the comments link is...) but I really can't stand to listen to her lecture America. I never want to hear the hectoring, not now, not for the next four years. Yeah, there are policy differences between the two. Sure. I simply can't take her campaign's negativity. I can't stand Mister Clinton's finger wagging. His red-faced admonishment of the press, and of us by extension for caring about the details.

    Dear Wisconsin. You may have ended up putting a merciful end to part one of this snipe-fest. I propose that we Californians declare a moratorium on harassing you about your dairy products. It's the least we can do for the favor you've done us.

    Your pal,

    - bob

    Monday
    Feb042008

    Jaunty Soooper Gooogly Mooogly Tooosday Voter Guide

    Dear American Heroes,

    If you, like we knuckleheads in California, are part of the primary voting cluster of democracy tomorrow, you're no doubt excited about the possibilities. The possibility of having your vote on a ballot proposition overturned by an aggrieved loser in court. The possibility that your favorite candidate will change positions sometime in May to appeal to the important baby seal-clubbing voting block. The possibility that superdelegates will trump everything that you thought you were voting for at the convention.

    This is the important turning point of our cherished democracy.

    Well then, now that we've got all the pessimism out of the way, let's get to The Jaunty Little Blog Recommendations For Filling In Those Tiny Dots!

    • Proposition 91 - Transportation Funds. Initiative Constitutional Amendment Please. Amending the state Constitution again? Stop it already. Vote no just on principle.
    • Proposition 92 - Community Colleges. Funding. Governance. Fees. Initiative Constitutional Amendment and Statute. Um, with the Constitution? No thanks.
    • Proposition 93 - Limits on Legislator's Terms In Office. Initiative Constitutional Amendment. This one's a stinker. Not only because it amends the Constitution like a drunken, um, Constitution amender, but because it grandfathers in current legislators for another 12 years when they would've been termed out now. Looking at you Perata and Nunez. Those guys and their cronies need to go away. Vote no on this one. Who knows, maybe you'll see some cool Fabien Nunez For Dogcatcher mailers in November. Or they'll go to court to overturn your vote.
    • Propositions 94 through 97 - Referenda on Amendments to Indian Gaming Compacts Wow. How much money has been spent on campaigning for and against these? The folks against own some dog tracks and Vegas casinos. Oh, and a couple smaller tribes who don't like the new facilities these compacts afford four of the wealthiest tribes. We here at Jaunty Election Central think that's just sour grapes. The smaller tribes can negotiate their own new compacts and the dog tracks can pound sand. In exchange, the tribes give the state some more money than they do now. They really don't have to, being sovereign nations. Sounds like a winner to us.
    • Presidential Candidates Vote for the person you like. I like Mister Obama despite the looks and smell of his financial dealings in Chicago. I certainly can do without the crabby Clintons. I get my recommended daily allowance of mud slinging just getting out of my driveway in the morning, thankyouverymuch. Romney could theoretically convince me to buy a watch out of the J.C. Penney catalog (it looks good on him), but little else. McCain, or as we refer to his candidacy around the office here, George Bush's third term? Yeah, um, no. We're not saying, we're just saying...

    There you have it. We've staked our positions which should prove highly valuable if you've just landed here from Mars. Otherwise you've already made up your mind, made your choices, and for crissakes gone out and placed your vote. Remember, if you don't vote, you can't complain about the next Assistant Secretary of the Interior nominee...

    Your pal,

    - bob

    Monday
    Jan282008

    Jaunty Political Analysis - State of the Union

    Holy crap!

    The president wants to make patenting and cloning human life illegal? How am I going to break the news to Bob Mark II™?

    - bob